Quirky parents, an annoying little brother, programming computer games in seemingly minutes on an ancient computer — remind you of your teen years? Perhaps not, but I’m sure many of you remember Clarissa’s.
A staple among many now 20 and 30 somethings in their younger years, Clarissa Explains It All was a Nickelodeon television show that ran for five seasons. Viewers watched as Clarissa explained the crazy lives of her friends and family. At no point does she ever let us in on why her father is cool with her teenage (male) best friend sneaking in her window on a regular basis. If only dads were that clueless in real life.
Here’s what the main cast members are up to today.
The show’s protagonist, Clarissa let us in on all her teenage troubles. She followed up her Nickelodeon success with another teen hit Sabrina the Teenage Witch. Since, she has appeared in two ABC made for TV movies and starred in the short lived Melissa & Joey alongside fellow former child star Joey Lawrence.
She has been married to Mark Wilkerson since 2003 and they have three children together.
Clarissa’s little brother “Ferguson” never ceased to annoy and always was up to something. Jason retired from acting following the show’s completion. He would go on to graduate from the University of Notre Dame and now works as a software designer for HBO.
Sean still acts occasionally these days, though there has been nothing notable since Clarissa ended. His most recent credits are Party Guest and Protestor #1. Perhaps he should open a store selling tie dye shirts and various other neon clothing?
Architect Marshall father turned a blind eye to Sam climbing in his daughter’s window, but actor Joe O’Conner jumped at the chance to appear in the music video for Tom Green’s “The Bum Bum Song.” He has moved on to more respectable gigs as of late, with appearances in hits such as Mad Men and Weeds.
“Janet Darling” Elizabeth Hess
Mom Janet always had a cause to fight for or some bizarre food for everyone to try. These days, Elizabeth Hess teaches at New York University and has appeared in both on and off Broadway plays.
The death of a loved one is always a difficult time that no one can avoid. Healing can be a long, ongoing process for a recently deceased friends and family. The following made sure though that they went out leaving one last smile on the faces of the people that were special to them.
This family has the best nick names
James Ward was 39 years old when he passed away in 2006. To his family, he was better known as “Beef,” “Pork” or “Bubba.” Of course, his family was not to be outdone. Highlights from his surviving family in his obituary include his beloved mother “Buffalo Butt” Barbara Jean (how many people can get away with calling their mother that?), his father “Old Fart” Richard or his sister “Turtle” among others.
He saved the sweetest for the fiancé he left behind, “Light of his life” Annie.
Bill Eves, 1937-2014. We are all richer for knowing not to hold in your farts.
Mr. Eves, world renowned expert on fart safety
On Saturday February the 8th Molson’s stock price fell sharply on the news of Bill Eves’ passing. Senior executives at Molson called an emergency meeting to brace for the impact of the anticipated drop in sales.
As a highly regarded principal for 33 years with the separate school board he created many fond memories for staff, students and families. After his retirement he pursued some of his many hobbies including cooking, carpentry, gardening and sending daily joke emails to family and friends. Perhaps most important to Bill was educating people on the dangers of holding in your farts. Sadly, he was unable to attain his life-long goal of catching his beloved wife Judy “cutting the cheese” or “playing the bum trumpet” — which he likened to a mythical rarity like spotting Bigfoot or a unicorn. He also mastered the art of swearing while being splattered by grease cooking his famous wings. In fact, he wove tapestry of obscenities that still hangs over the Greater Kingston Area.
Scott Entsminger was a life-long, season ticket holding Cleveland Brown fan who passed away at 55. After retiring from his career as an auto worker, he spent his time offering his advice to team management on how the team should be run. Given their recent success, it couldn’t have hurt to have given him a shot. Clearly Scott had a good sense of humor, as you can see from the one last ribbing he gave his favorite team in his obituary.
He respectfully requests six Cleveland Brown pall bearers so the Browns can let him down one last time.
Right to the end, at age 91, he would do things like pushing fist bumps at perfect strangers, playing boogie woogie and other foot- tapping piano right in front of innocent people, and racing to beat other oldsters to empty chairs (which is how he tripped and broke his hip, leading eventually to his well-earned demise).
A longtime member of Vasa Lutheran Church, not only did he sing in the church choir since he was 18, he also helped dig the church basement. Many will remember Emmett for his unforgettable beard, something that he’s had since 1975 when the Vikings lost the Super Bowl to the Steelers. A staunch Vikings fan, the beard was not coming off until the Vikings won a Super Bowl. Needless to say, Emmett died having never shaved his beard. More than the Vikings, farming and education, his family was most important to Emmett and he loved them dearly.
Man writes his own obituary, leaving some surprising confessions
Now that I have gone to my reward, I have confessions and things I should now say. As it turns out, I AM the guy who stole the safe from the Motor View Drive Inn back in June, 1971. I could have left that unsaid, but I wanted to get it off my chest. Also, I really am NOT a PhD. What happened was that the day I went to pay off my college student loan at the U of U, the girl working there put my receipt into the wrong stack, and two weeks later, a PhD diploma came in the mail. I didn’t even graduate, I only had about 3 years of college credit. In fact, I never did even learn what the letters “PhD” even stood for.
Well, that must have been quite the eyeopener for his coworkers considering he was an electrical engineer!
But with the engines already at full throttle, he has made a grave mistake. He is sucked into the powerful jet engine but amazingly survives. Daniel P. Streckfuss, who was on board, describes how Bridget escaped death:
What allowed him to survive was the design of the A-6 engine (the J-52). It has a long protruding ‘bullet’ or cone that extends in front of the first stage fans. When he was sucked in, his arm extended above his head which caused his body to wedge between the bullet and inside wall of the intake. Lucky for him, his cranial and float coat were sucked in first causing the FOD’d engine which prompted the pilot to cut the throttle (commanded by the Shooter who moves into the frame kneeling and moving his wand up and down). It took almost 3 minutes for him to push his way out of the intake after being sucked in.
Not all are so lucky. In 2006, 114 passengers and 5 crew members were witness to the gruesome demise via jet engine of an airline mechanic as they waited on the tarmac in a Continental Airlines 737 flight to Houston. Larry Keller, Chairman and CEO, issued the following very brief statement after the tragic incident:
My fellow co-workers and I extend our heartfelt sympathies to the family and friends of the mechanic involved in this tragic event.
What follows is video of John Bridget’s miraculous escape from fate.
Don’t forget to share this incredible video with your friends!