People Who Went Out in Style, the Funniest Obituaries You’ll Ever See!

The death of a loved one is always a difficult time that no one can avoid. Healing can be a long, ongoing process for a recently deceased friends and family. The following made sure though that they went out leaving one last smile on the faces of the people that were special to them.

This family has the best nick names

James Ward was 39 years old when he passed away in 2006. To his family, he was better known as “Beef,” “Pork” or “Bubba.” Of course, his family was not to be outdone. Highlights from his surviving family in his obituary include his beloved mother “Buffalo Butt” Barbara Jean (how many people can get away with calling their mother that?), his father “Old Fart” Richard or his sister “Turtle” among others.

He saved the sweetest for the fiancé he left behind, “Light of his life” Annie.

Call him Beef. Or Pork. Or Bubba.

Beef, beloved son of Buffalo Butt and Old Fart

Image Credit: mentalfloss.com

Bill Eves, 1937-2014. We are all richer for knowing not to hold in your farts.

Mr. Eves, world renowned expert on fart safety

Mr. Eves, world renowned expert on fart safety

On Saturday February the 8th Molson’s stock price fell sharply on the news of Bill Eves’ passing. Senior executives at Molson called an emergency meeting to brace for the impact of the anticipated drop in sales.

As a highly regarded principal for 33 years with the separate school board he created many fond memories for staff, students and families. After his retirement he pursued some of his many hobbies including cooking, carpentry, gardening and sending daily joke emails to family and friends. Perhaps most important to Bill was educating people on the dangers of holding in your farts. Sadly, he was unable to attain his life-long goal of catching his beloved wife Judy “cutting the cheese” or “playing the bum trumpet” — which he likened to a mythical rarity like spotting Bigfoot or a unicorn. He also mastered the art of swearing while being splattered by grease cooking his famous wings. In fact, he wove tapestry of obscenities that still hangs over the Greater Kingston Area.

Credit: paynefuneralhome.com

Browns fan can’t resist getting in one last dig

Scott Entsminger was a life-long, season ticket holding Cleveland Brown fan who passed away at 55. After retiring from his career as an auto worker, he spent his time offering his advice to team management on how the team should be run. Given their recent success, it couldn’t have hurt to have given him a shot. Clearly Scott had a good sense of humor, as you can see from the one last ribbing he gave his favorite team in his obituary.

He respectfully requests six Cleveland Brown pall bearers so the Browns can let him down one last time.

obituaries-03Image Credit: news.softpedia.com

This guy has the right way of thinking

Jack Jones obituary seems straightforward enough — until you get to the final line. He’s got the right idea if you ask me.

Jones. Jack Jones.

Jones. Jack Jones.

Image Credit: pikdit.com

Bill loved to fist bump strangers

obituaries-05Image Credit: legacy.com

Right to the end, at age 91, he would do things like pushing fist bumps at perfect strangers, playing boogie woogie and other foot- tapping piano right in front of innocent people, and racing to beat other oldsters to empty chairs (which is how he tripped and broke his hip, leading eventually to his well-earned demise).

Thanks to the Vikings, Emmett couldn’t shave

obituaries-06Image Credit: legacy.com

A longtime member of Vasa Lutheran Church, not only did he sing in the church choir since he was 18, he also helped dig the church basement. Many will remember Emmett for his unforgettable beard, something that he’s had since 1975 when the Vikings lost the Super Bowl to the Steelers. A staunch Vikings fan, the beard was not coming off until the Vikings won a Super Bowl. Needless to say, Emmett died having never shaved his beard. More than the Vikings, farming and education, his family was most important to Emmett and he loved them dearly.

Man writes his own obituary, leaving some surprising confessions

obituaries-07Image Credit: saltlaketribune.com

Now that I have gone to my reward, I have confessions and things I should now say. As it turns out, I AM the guy who stole the safe from the Motor View Drive Inn back in June, 1971. I could have left that unsaid, but I wanted to get it off my chest. Also, I really am NOT a PhD. What happened was that the day I went to pay off my college student loan at the U of U, the girl working there put my receipt into the wrong stack, and two weeks later, a PhD diploma came in the mail. I didn’t even graduate, I only had about 3 years of college credit. In fact, I never did even learn what the letters “PhD” even stood for.

Well, that must have been quite the eyeopener for his coworkers considering he was an electrical engineer!

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Navy Man Sucked into Jet Engine — and Survives! Watch Now!

Desert Storm, February 20th, 1991. A trainee on the flight deck has been asked to check a launching mechanism on an A63 Intruder.

Trainee inspects A6E Intruder

Trainee inspects A6E Intruder

Image Credit: youtube

He finishes his check and begins to move away when 21 year old John Bridget approaches.

John Bridget approaches

John Bridget approaches

Image Credit: youtube

But with the engines already at full throttle, he has made a grave mistake. He is sucked into the powerful jet engine but amazingly survives. Daniel P. Streckfuss, who was on board, describes how Bridget escaped death:

What allowed him to survive was the design of the A-6 engine (the J-52). It has a long protruding ‘bullet’ or cone that extends in front of the first stage fans. When he was sucked in, his arm extended above his head which caused his body to wedge between the bullet and inside wall of the intake. Lucky for him, his cranial and float coat were sucked in first causing the FOD’d engine which prompted the pilot to cut the throttle (commanded by the Shooter who moves into the frame kneeling and moving his wand up and down). It took almost 3 minutes for him to push his way out of the intake after being sucked in.

Bridget (left) hours after the event

Bridget (left) hours after the event

Image Credit: youtube

Not all are so lucky. In 2006, 114 passengers and 5 crew members were witness to the gruesome demise via jet engine of an airline mechanic as they waited on the tarmac in a Continental Airlines 737 flight to Houston. Larry Keller, Chairman and CEO, issued the following very brief statement after the tragic incident:

My fellow co-workers and I extend our heartfelt sympathies to the family and friends of the mechanic involved in this tragic event.

What follows is video of John Bridget’s miraculous escape from fate.

Don’t forget to share this incredible video with your friends!

What Would The Simpsons House Look Like if it Were Real? Find Out Here

They’ve been one of our favorite television families for over two decades now. What started as an animated short on the Tracy Ullman show has become one of television’s all-time classics. It has weathered multiple wars, Presidents and everything Bart and Homer could conjure up.

The house we all know and love

The house we all know and love

Image Credits: jaysbrickblog.com

But what would it be like to really live in the Simpsons house? One lucky contest winner was given the chance to find out – if they so chose. A real-life replica of 742 Evergreen Terrace was built at 712 Red Bark Lane in Henderson, Nevada. The winning family was given the choice of $75,000 or the house, provided they repaint to comply with local home owners’ association ordinances.

In the following photos, you’ll see the real-life recreation of the rooms where Bart, Lisa, Homer, Marge and Maggie have given you so much entertainment over the years. Finally, you’ll see what the house looks like today.

742 Evergreen Terrace / 712

712 Red Bark Lane / 742 Evergreen Terrace

Image Credit: spotcoolstuff.com

simpsons-kitchenImage Credit: dailymail.co.uk

Simpsons creator Matt Groening heads up the stairs

Simpsons creator Matt Groening heads up the stairs

Image Credit: simpsoncrazy.com

The couch even looks like it's been worn in by Homer

The couch even looks like it’s been worn in by Homer

Image Credit: villageofjoy.com

Margaret, or "Maggie's" high chair

Margaret, or “Maggie’s” high chair

Image Credit: spotcoolstuff.com

Where 3.2 children were made

Where 3.2 children were made

Image Credit: dailymail.co.uk

The dining room, where Homer embarrasses Marge in front of dinner guests

The Simpson family dining room

Image Credit: truenewsusa.blogspot.com

…and finally, the house as it looks today. It was fun while it lasted.

Some people are just no fun

Some people are just no fun

Image Credit: wikipedia